SO, I've planned myself one heck of a trip. I'll be gone a total of 24 days. I will be traveling to Arizona, NJ, NY, and New Hampshire. I will be 7 months pregnant for most of the trip and I will be partaking in the following celebrations:
-father's birthday
-sister's middle school graduation
-brother's high school graduation
-Littleman's actual birthday
-Z's wedding (rehersal dinner, and all that goes on with wedding fun)
-mother's birthday
-sister's high school graduation
Papabear has to go to a PA conference in San Diego while Littleman and I are in AZ. Is he a little depressed about spending five days in San Diego without us? Um...if you know Papabear then you know the answer is YES.
Am I totally broke from the purchasing of plane tickets and presents? Emphatic YES. Would I have it any other way? No, of course not. And this is why I am perpetually having money troubles...well, one of the reasons, anyhow.
Am I excited about the trip? Yes and No. The Arizona portion will be awesome. My family will have to drag me out of my dad's salt water pool every day as I plan to emerge only when my bladder calls. I will be taking all meals poolside. I have three younger siblings there who are full of energy and love Littleman. My Arizona family is full of hugs and kisses. They love sitting around and talking and snacking. My kind of people. Even with all the festivities, I know I will get to relax a bit.
The NY, NJ, NH portion of the trip I am a little worried about. It will be pretty busy and there are SO SO SO many people I want to see. I won't have a car (except for the wedding weekend, when Papabear and I will rent one). My heart literally aches because I simply do not know if I can or will see so many of the people I miss so much. Visits will be brief. :( Torturous. Ug. Time and money, things I lack. I AM looking forward to being back on the east coast. I miss my brothers and sister there so much - I haven't seen them in a year...and just typing that physically hurts.
And Papabear...out of our entire time away, he will only get to see Littleman ONE day. I am picking Papabear up at Newark and driving straight to New Hampshire. Littleman will be staying with my mom for the weekend. The only day he gets to see Littleman is the day we return from the wedding and then he flies back to TX the next day. I know Papabear is trying not to think about this. He still has "issues" about missing so much of Littleman's first two years. I promised him last year that I wouldn't take anymore of these long trips without him...but missing my family got to be too much. I need to see them....
Well, in all honesty, in two and a half months I'll have a baby. We are living on a single income. I will no longer be able to afford traveling all over the country, let alone WANT to haul two kiddos on my own. I will actually have to stay put and the family will have to come to me. I hope they will. I sometimes feel like they forget all the times I drove for hours or flew so I could be there for birthdays and holidays.....well...anyway, as I am certain I have said before, missing is a central theme in my life. I will never like it, but I am learning to live with it.
On a final note, I just want to shout out praises for my Littleman. We've been talking a lot about being independent and he's really taking to it. Every morning, before he comes into wake me, he puts his pull-up in the trash, gets dressed, and brushes his teeth. Sometimes he even washes his face and remembers to put his pj's in the hamper! I do fully expect regression when the bambino arrives, but for now, Papabear and I are singing Littleman's praises as much as possible.
Well, Littleman and I leave tomorrow. I'm sure I'll post while I'm away...if not, have a lovely May and early June!
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